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1-Page Summary of The Highly Sensitive Person
Introduction
If you’ve been told that you’re too sensitive or need to develop thicker skin, then it’s likely that you are a highly sensitive person. You might have even thought of this as a flaw and tried to get over it.
Being sensitive isn’t a bad thing. It’s something that about 20% of people have, and it means you’re more aware than others. Noticing the subtleties in your environment is a good thing; however, being so sensitive can be overwhelming at times. For example, bright lights or loud noises probably affect you more than they do other people. You might also find yourself wanting to be alone quite often because being around too many people can make you feel overwhelmed.
Being an HSP is not a defect, it’s just another trait. It’s common and can be used to your advantage if you know how to understand it and use it for the right purposes. Don’t try to overcome being an HSP, instead embrace that trait and make the most of it.
The Facts About Being Highly Sensitive
Kristen was born with a condition that made her hypersensitive to sounds and other stimuli. She worked hard in school, but teachers thought she wasn’t paying attention because she couldn’t filter out all the noise around her. Her parents took her to many doctors who tested everything from Kristen’s hearing to psychological development. The tests showed that she was perfectly healthy; she simply struggled to filter out excessive stimuli. But being told this by so many people made an impact on Kristen: She knew there was something wrong with her.
Some people are more sensitive to stimuli than others. However, the amount of arousal for anyone is best in the middle; too little stimulation is boring and too much is stressful. Therefore, HSPs notice things that other people don’t and tend to be more intuitive because they’re paying close attention. They also tend to be conscientious and wise compared with everyone else because they pay attention so well even when no one else does. Many innovators and artists are HSPs because of this trait.
On the one hand, highly sensitive people are overwhelmed by stimuli that others find inconsequential. On the other hand, they’re also more aware of their surroundings and better able to pick up on subtle cues from others. So it’s not really a question of whether sensitivity is good or bad; we need both kinds of people in society.
Digging Deeper
Rob and Rebecca are fraternal twins, but they were different from each other since their birth. Rob was a calm baby while Rebecca had nightmares as a child. This continued throughout their lives; Rebecca loved restaurants, the ocean, and carousels, whereas Rob would avoid them all his life.
High sensitivity is a trait that is genetically determined. There are scientific studies to support this claim, such as one by Dr. Jerome Kagan who found that some babies have higher levels of norepinephrine and cortisol, the hormones associated with stress and arousal. These babies had stronger reactions to stimuli and were more likely to fear new scenarios later in life.
Some have concluded that there are two systems in the brain: one that tells us to be curious and bold, and another that tells us to be cautious. The strength of these systems will determine our sensitivity level. This distinction also explains why some HSPs are more sensitive than others. A person with a strong inhibition system but an average-to-weak activation system may feel torn between curiosity and caution. They’re probably hesitant and quiet, but someone with a weak inhibition system yet a strong activation system is probably daring and anxious, bored yet overwhelmed.
