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1-Page Summary of The Gift Of Fear
Overview
Violence can be avoided. Every human being has a mechanism that warns them of danger and allows them to get to safety. That mechanism is called fear, and it’s a gift because it helps us stay safe. If we listen to our fear without hesitation, we’ll be able to avoid violence in the future.
Have you ever had a bad feeling while walking home at night? Maybe you’ve been made uneasy by a stranger on the subway. Or maybe someone wouldn’t take no for an answer when dating you.
We all experience situations that make us feel unsafe, and only one thing keeps us from getting hurt—our instinct.
Most acts of violence are predictable. There are signs that we can identify with more accuracy, and our gut can tell us to escape by sending a queasy feeling through our bodies. We need to learn how to use fear in order for it to be effective, so let’s look at the signals and see how we can empower our natural instincts.
There are several key points in this article. One is that people who offer to help others may be using a predatory technique, and another one is that victims of domestic violence often stay with their abusers because they don’t know how to leave the relationship.
Big Idea #1: Your intuition is the best way to protect yourself from danger.
It’s best to listen to your dreams, since they’re a part of intuition.
Your dreams can be a source of danger, and you should be careful.
Police officer Michael Cantrell has noticed that people who dream of being shot tend to get shot. Patrick told him this, and he took it very seriously.
Patrick should listen to his intuition more often because it has helped him in the past.
For example, the two policemen had once pulled over a car with three men inside. The driver and passenger were nervous, but Patrick didn’t notice anything unusual.
When the driver got out of the car, Cantrell noticed that two men in the back seat were looking straight ahead and refused to make eye contact. This was a sign of danger for him, but his rational mind didn’t catch it until he saw a gun on the floor.
Meanwhile, Patrick continued to smoke his pipe.
Patrick ignored his intuition and paid the price for it. He had a dream that warned him of danger, but he didn’t heed the warning.
Later, Patrick was on patrol alone and noticed a pair of men driving by who looked like armed robbers.
A Detroit police officer responded to his own call and was helping a man out when the passenger pulled a gun and shot him.
Luckily, he survived. The incident could have been avoided, though, if he had followed his intuition.
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Big Idea #2: Don’t be fooled by people who seem nice and friendly.
Have you ever made a friend and then that person betrayed you? Criminals do the same thing. They make friends with people, only to betray them later.
A common trick is pretending to be a friend when you’re actually a criminal. This can only be seen through with highly developed intuition and awareness.
Sometimes, people are very good at persuading others without directly trying to. For example, one day a woman named Kelly was carrying groceries up the stairs when her bag ripped and cans of cat food rolled down the stairs.
A man in the building offered to help bring her cans of food. She felt afraid and wanted to decline his offer, but he insisted that they had a cat upstairs.
At this point, Kelly should have gotten more suspicious; the stranger used pronouns to build a false sense of togetherness.
The man used a technique called forced teaming, but Kelly’s first reaction was correct. The stranger turned out to be a rapist and murderer. Luckily, Kelly escaped with her life.
