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1-Page Summary of The Big Disconnect

Overview

The digital revolution has changed our lives. It’s embedded the internet into our daily routine, and we can now text friends on WhatsApp, post vacation snapshots on Facebook, and stream music online. The rise of digital media is changing how we raise our children as well.

How much exposure to digital media is appropriate for children? How can we save our kids from explicit or violent content on the Internet? And what do we do when they’re bullied online?

There are many risks to raising children in the digital age. We’ll learn about them and how to avoid them. We’ll also find out why people insult us so much when we communicate online, why educational DVDs aren’t as helpful as they seem, and how Facebook can traumatize teenagers.

Big Idea #1: Excessive exposure to digital media interferes with a child’s development.

If you’ve ever used a chat room, message board or social media site, then you’ve probably been insulted by someone. These digital interactions are not meaningless; they have an impact on how we interact with others in the real world.

A mentally healthy adult was not born that way. They develop it over time and learn how to make good friends through social interaction with other people.

Spending too much time online can decrease empathy.

A group of Stanford researchers did over 70 studies on empathy. They found that college students are 40% less empathetic than they were in 1979.

Technology has been blamed for the decline in empathy. In fact, exposure to too much technology can make people less empathetic and makes it harder for children to concentrate.

A survey of teenagers revealed that those who did their homework on the computer were distracted by other activities. In fact, they spent at least two-thirds of their time doing something else entirely.

Digital media has a huge effect on children’s development. It’s making it harder for children to focus, hurting school performance and suppressing empathy because they’re seeing rude comments everywhere online all the time.

Big Idea #2: Babies suffer when their parents are distracted by their devices.

Any new parents can tell you how magical it is to look into their baby’s eyes or hear their child’s voice for the first time. However, if a parent spends too much time on a smartphone instead of interacting with their child, the child might develop problems. Babies need sensory interaction from their parents in order to learn and grow emotionally and intellectually. When babies see something they like or want to do, they mimic what they see other people doing in order to communicate what they like or want. This process helps them learn language and abstract thought skills as well as social skills that will help them later in life.

Toddlers who watch educational TV shows don’t get the same benefits as babies. They’re not getting enough stimulation in their brains to develop speaking and reading skills.

Children suffer as well when their parents spend too much time with technology. Patricia Kuhl from the University of Washington has proven that babies are emotionally distressed when they see an emotionless expression on their parent’s face. This is the same face a person makes while looking at a screen, and therefore it becomes apparent that infants misinterpret “screen faces” as showing parental depression. Recall that babies grow up in an emotionally insecure environment when they have to deal with depressed parents who didn’t know how to change this new behavior of spending so many hours on screens.

When children are ready for preschool, they have to face technology troubles.