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1-Page Summary of The Art of Seduction

Overview

The Art of Seduction (2001) by Robert Greene is a self-help book about getting what you want from others. The author describes the seducer as someone who can manipulate people for their own benefit. This person does this with careful planning, psychological analysis, and theatrical flair to tear down victims’ resistance to get exactly what they want.

Seduction is a learned skill. It can be natural, but it usually takes practice to perfect. The first step in seducing someone is understanding yourself and the person you’re trying to seduce. There are nine different types of people who are good at seducing others, and each type should figure out which one they fit into best.

There are two types of seducers: sirens and rakes. Sirens use their sexual energy to lure victims, while rakes are more aggressive than magnetic. They like pursuit and may be devoted to a conquest for only a short time.

There are three types of people who aren’t overtly sexual. Ideal lovers have a mythical quality and appeal to the ideals of high storybook romance. Naturals are childlike, with no artifice or pretense about them. Charmers rely mostly on their skill in pleasing people through flattery and attention.

Dandies are people who mix and match their clothes, often with an odd combination of colors. They appeal to the public’s desire to break the rules by subverting gender roles in social settings. Coquettes pretend that they’re emotionally distant from others, which is often attractive.

The last two types of seducers are charismatics and stars. Charismatics have the confidence that is common in politicians, whereas stars are more mysterious and have a dreamlike quality. Generally speaking, to be able to seduce someone requires you to understand them well enough so that you can control them. Anti-seducers do not focus on other people’s needs as much as they focus on their own desires.

There are two types of people who get seduced: victims and seducers. Victims share one thing in common: they’re missing something important in their lives. Seducers identify that missing piece and provide it for them.

Seduction is a strategic enterprise, meaning that you have to analyze the target and figure out what works best. You can mix and match strategies, but generally you want to charm them without giving too much away. People are narcissists, so flattery will go a long way with them. In order for the victim to be seduced by you, they need to find you fascinating without becoming overly familiar with you. If they get too close emotionally or psychologically, then it’s time for some misdirection (i.e., changing the subject).

Some people are naturally good at seducing others, but with careful planning and analysis, anyone can learn to do it.

Key Point 1: Seducers must enhance their natural charisma to make themselves as appealing to victims as possible.

Charisma is a spectrum, and we can improve our charisma by working on it. As recently as the twentieth century, psychologists thought that likability was fixed at birth. However, more recent research shows that likability can be improved with effort.

Researchers have found that some characteristics, like height, are linked to charisma. For example, in one study tall managers were better liked by their employees than shorter ones. Other qualities that can be changed on a daily basis also contribute to your charisma and influence over others. For example, if you’re well rested then you’ll be more charismatic than someone who is tired.

Personal charisma can be enhanced with simple tweaks to body language and speaking habits. These behaviors often exist outside of conscious awareness, but they’re controllable. One easy way to boost your charisma is by pausing before you speak in a conversation. Another tactic is to show full attention over the course of a conversation instead of being distracted by something else like a cell phone. Mindfulness meditation will help you develop conspicuous listening skills which are essential for personal charisma.