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1-Page Summary of How to Raise An Adult

Overview

This book is critical of elite American colleges and questions the academic quality of these institutions. It reveals how they stifle independent thought, thereby reproducing class inequality.

Having children is one of the biggest events in many people’s lives. It’s natural that we want to do everything possible to help them and make sure they have what they need. However, this eagerness has spiraled out of control, leading to a kind of parenting that does not prepare our children for adulthood. We should start doing something about it by raising adults instead of kids.

In this article, you’ll learn how to raise kids without telling them they can achieve anything and focus on the journey more than the destination. Also, by not overparenting your children, you’ll reduce their chances of abusing drugs in the future. And finally, I’ll explain what it means to grow up.

Big Idea #1: Overparenting is harmful to kids.

In today’s parenting world, there is too much of a good thing. Helicopter parents hover over their children and don’t let them grow up to be independent people. This isn’t good at all.

Flashback to the 1981 abduction and murder of six-year-old Adam Walsh, an event that inspired a hugely popular movie. The fear of crime led parents in the U.S. to focus on protecting their children from danger rather than preparing them for life.

Parents are afraid of many things. They’re worried about their children getting into accidents, becoming ill or being kidnapped. However, these fears are irrational because it’s more likely for a child to die in an equestrian accident than to be kidnapped. Parents also parent with the hope that it will give the kids the best opportunities later in life. That’s why parents manage their children’s extracurricular time so stringently; they want them to get into good schools and become successful businesspeople. But that doesn’t mean those parents have prepared their children for life.

Moreover, helicopter parenting is a means to an end: achieving something the parents think is important. However, just because they see it as necessary doesn’t mean that their children will be happy doing it.

Some parents are so involved in their children’s lives that they’re called helicopter parents. They want to make sure their kids are successful and do what it takes to get them into the best schools. Some of these parents even hire lawyers if they think their child is getting bad grades.

But is it really a bad thing to look out for your child’s well-being? No, not in theory. However, helicopter parents go too far by doing the following:

Big Idea #2: Overparenting can lead to psychological problems and drug abuse in kids.

Helicopter parenting can be detrimental to children, as they often lack the life skills necessary for success in college and beyond. For example, many students who grew up with helicopter parents are unable to manage their time appropriately or talk to strangers.

Having helicopter parents can lead to certain psychological problems.

According to a 2013 American College Health Association study, 83.4percent of all college freshmen felt overwhelmed by their college obligations. Some even considered suicide because they thought they couldn’t handle the stress of school and life in general. We can’t blame this on overparenting, but it certainly plays a role in how unprepared kids feel when going off to school for the first time. When parents do everything for their children, those children don’t develop confidence in themselves and end up not knowing how to deal with problems when they arise.