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1-Page Summary of Girl, Stop Apologizing
Introduction
Many women apologize for who they are and what they want out of life. They also live in fear of their own goals, asking themselves “What if I…?” It’s time to ask how much control you have over your life and how much is expected from you.
People are meant to do great things. In order to do that, you need to identify and discard the excuses holding you back. You also need to adopt new behaviors and skills in order to achieve your goals.
Excuses to Let Go Of
One of the first things that women do when they’re pursuing their goals is to downplay what they’ve accomplished. This happens because they are afraid of what other people will think about them. For example, Rachel Hollis was working hard at her job and enjoying it, but she didn’t want others to know about it. She thought that if anyone found out, then she would be judged for doing something so ambitious as starting a blog and writing books. So she kept quiet about her accomplishments until someone said something negative about her work or personality, which made her question herself and not stand up for herself or defend herself against those who were trying to bring her down.
Many people feel like they’re living half a life because others don’t understand and support what makes them thrive. They might be dressing or acting in ways that other people expect of them, rather than being true to themselves. This mindset leads to letting other people define their worth. But they can change this by being themselves and not caring about what others think of them.
Another excuse is that you’re not goal-oriented. This isn’t a trait that’s in your genes and can’t be changed. It’s more likely that you just haven’t gotten to the point where you are goal oriented yet. Everyone has goals; it’s just a matter of what they want to achieve, which is their dream. So get working on your dreams! You can’t have a dream and expect it to come true without doing anything about it. By becoming goal-oriented, or by working towards achieving your dreams, you’ll grow as an individual tremendously.
The third excuse for not working on your goals is that you don’t have time. However, you control your schedule and should evaluate how to use it better. For example, Chelsea was busy with work and school but found herself getting bored of her phone. She decided she could find five hours a week if she used the phone less often.
If you want to manage your time better, make a schedule for the week. Don’t account for every minute of your day, but rather focus on the hours that you can dedicate to achieving your goal. Make sure those hours are scheduled during times when you’re most productive and don’t let anything interfere with them.
A common excuse for not pursuing your goals is that you’re not good enough. The thing you’re attempting to do will prove this excuse wrong. If you say you can’t swim 3 miles without stopping and never try, then you won’t be able to swim 3 miles without stopping. However, if you try and succeed, suddenly it will be possible for you to swim 3 miles without stopping.
As you get older, it’s common to have the fear of failure. This is because as you age, your tolerance for failure decreases and people become less tolerant of your failures. To combat this fear, acknowledge all the things that you’ve done in life that were successful. Then focus on how being a newbie has its advantages: You’re flexible and teachable.
A fifth excuse for not pursuing your goal is that you can’t do it and still be a good mom, wife, daughter, employee or girlfriend. Most people who make this excuse won’t pursue their goals if it’s going to hurt someone else. However, remember that you only live once. You have to decide whether you’re going to spend your life doing what other people want or doing what makes you happy.
