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1-Page Summary of Emotional Intelligence
Overview
When you’re very angry, take a break to calm down. This may help you avoid saying something hurtful in the heat of an argument.
Some people believe that emotions only play a role in romantic relationships or physical confrontations. However, they’re actually involved in all of our decisions and interactions with others.
This book explains the role emotions play in our lives and how they can lead us astray. It also highlights the importance of emotional intelligence, which allows us to use emotions to create positive outcomes and avoid negative situations. We learn about how this capacity can be acquired and improved upon.
Finally, the article explores how emotional intelligence develops in individuals and why it’s so important for society as a whole.
Big Idea #1: Emotions are critical to our lives. They help us learn, understand others and motivate us to take action.
Do our emotions hold us back? Would we do better if we were emotionless and logical?
Emotions are important to us because they help us live satisfying lives. One way emotions do this is by helping us learn from our memories.
Our brains store experiences in a way that not only records facts, but also our feelings. For example, if a little boy touches a hot stove and feels the pain of it, he will remember that feeling should he touch another stove again. His emotions will help him to learn from his experience and keep him away from touching stoves again.
Emotions help us understand others’ feelings, which can allow us to predict their actions. For example, if a man is angry and has clenched fists or a loud voice, you will know his emotional state. You can therefore predict his future actions; he might be ready to hit someone.
Emotions also drive us to action. If we feel threatened, for example, our emotions will kick in and prepare us to react quickly if the threat becomes real.
After a certain point, people lose the capacity to feel emotions and no longer act like they used to. They tend to do nothing at all, which has been observed in patients who have had their heads cut open for brain surgery called lobotomy. As a result of it, they can’t feel or perceive any emotion.
Big Idea #2: Emotions can sometimes be a hindrance to our judgment.
Emotions are important tools for dealing with the world around us, but they can also lead to mistakes.
When we are emotional, it’s harder to think clearly. We can only process so much at once and our minds become overloaded with thoughts that aren’t rational or helpful.
For example, you might overreact to situations when you’re frightened. For instance, if there’s a sheet on the washing line that looks like a ghost, you can mistake it for one.
Another way our emotions get the best of us is when we act before thinking things through. When information enters our brain, it first goes to an area that isn’t responsible for rational thought – the emotional part of the brain. If this part perceives a threat, it can cause us to act without consulting with our rational mind.
That’s why you might be startled when you’re walking through a forest and notice something strange out of the corner of your eye.
There are three ways that our emotions can lead us to act irrationally.
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Our brains are wired to think in the present based on past experiences. For example, a boy who was physically bullied at school may grow up to be a strong man, but still feel threatened by his former bully.
Emotions are important, but they can sometimes cloud our judgment and make us irrational. Therefore we need to find a way to control them so that we can think clearly.
