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Overview

Most people who grow up have parents that love them unconditionally, but what happens when their parents suddenly start to criticize something about them? That’s the question Garrard Conley found himself facing as a gay teenager growing up in a fundamentalist Christian household.

Join us as we follow Conley on his journey through fear, rejection and confusion. He goes to a camp that promises to cure him of homosexuality. We’ll examine the damaging attitudes, shocking practices and heartbreaking consequences of gay conversion therapy. We’ll also explore what it’s like growing up gay in a small town in the Southern United States.

In this article, we will discuss the methods used to convert gay people; what fundamentalist Christians believe causes homosexuality and how they try to change those who are gay; and why many young gay people feel that their only choice is to change.

Big Idea #1: The ex-gay movement taught that homosexuality was a sinful yet curable addiction, just like alcoholism.

For many people, young adulthood is a time of self-discovery and experimentation. However, Garrard Conley had to learn how to erase an important part of his identity at the age of 19.

In 2004, Conley attended an intensive two-week program that was supposed to cure his homosexuality. The program was run by a fundamentalist Christian group called Love in Action.

Exodus International was part of a larger organization called Love in Action. It had an international reach and operated in countries such as Brazil, Australia, the Netherlands and the Philippines. The organization believed that homosexuality was unnatural perversion created by Satan. As part of its mission, it tried to “cure” people who were gay by sending them to intensive programs like the one Conley attended.

The Love in Action course had 12 steps that were meant to help people overcome their homosexuality. The steps included the principle that homosexuality was a sin and would lead them to have sex with animals. For example, when Conley browsed the website before joining up, he found it shocking how they compared homosexuals with pedophiles and bestiality.

Moreover, the program equated homosexuality to harmful addictions such as gambling and alcoholism. In other words, it presented itself as a sort of Alcoholics Anonymous for individuals who wanted to stop being homosexual. When Conley first arrived at the center, he was told that he used his sexuality to fill a void in his life. He needed instead to renounce homosexuality and fill that void with God.

Although he only spent a short time in the ex-gay movement, Conley’s experiences with Love In Action would haunt him for years.

Big Idea #2: Participants in the program were stripped of anything that might compromise traditional gender norms.

What influences a person’s identity? Is it their clothes, books they read or the friends with whom they associate? At Love in Action, Conley was forced to confront this question from the beginning because he had to give up his clothes and other possessions upon arriving.

Participants in the program were told that they needed to recover their true gender identities, which might have been suppressed by homosexuality. Anything that hindered this process was considered false and therefore confiscated. False images included wearing tank tops for men or short skirts for women, as well as excessive jewelry for men or campy speech patterns for women. To reinforce traditional ideas of femininity, female participants were required to shave their legs and armpits at least twice a week.